I know I can be pretty sassy on this little blog of mine, but I assure you I am a really nice and happy gal. So on that note, I am going to take a moment to list some of the things I hate. Hate is a strong word, but I am a strong woman (see how sweet I can be?)
1. Littering. Why the fuck do people litter? Do you really want the Earth to look like crap? This especially pisses me off at parks and other places I go to enjoy the beauty of nature. Nothing makes me feel more at one with the land than some a-hole's water bottle and Subway wrapper. I knew Jose was a keeper when he told me he once threw a wadded up fast food wrapper from his car floor into a woman's window in a traffic jam after he watched her litter....Captain Planet would be proud of you boo.
2. When my hair gets wrapped around my necklaces and forms a crazy knot at the clasp. That shit is nasty. I wish I could just stop shedding all together, I honestly think I shed more than my dog.
3. Racism. That's all I will say about it. It gets me madder than a wet hen, I have thrown people out of my house for racist comments. Jokes are ok, hatred ain't.
4. That little snot wad that forms on lotion bottles. I love to grease myself up with lotion at least twice a day, but the clumps sick me out something fierce.
5. People who are dicks to the handicapped. My uncle Kenny (also known as the greatest man on Earth) is special needs. I have had to witness countless people take advantage of him, make him feel bad, and look down on him my entire life. Seriously mess with Kenny and I will cut a bitch. He is cooler than all of us.
6. When Jose puts his dirty laundry on the floor of our bedroom right in front of the hamper. He is mostly pretty great, but the bastard is so messy. Sometimes I want to scream at the top of my lungs and then throw garbage at him like he did to that lady way back when.
7. When I am having the time of my life and the bar closes and no one has booze at their house. Now that I am older and wiser and have more money, this rarely happens...but it is still really shitty when they kick you out of a bar just because it is 2am and you really need like six more drinks at least.
8. Ticks. Since moving to the middle of nowhere I have had to remove 3 ticks from my body, and when I say I have had to, I mean Jose removed them while I cried. They are disgusting, I never even saw a tick in Michigan and I have always been outdoorsy-ish. Fred gets like a thousand each month and that is after we spend a small fortune on repellent. I think Obama should outlaw them.
I think that is all. If I come up with anything else I will let you all know. What are you hatin' on lately?
5 comments:
oh, i love this list!
the one thing that made it #1 on my hate list is hemorrhoids!
i also hate people who litter, who steal your effing parking spot when clearly they saw you waiting for it and decided to be a douchebag and steal it anyway and bad drivers. if you don't know how to drive, GET OFF THE FREAKING ROAD.
/end rant
I hate all these too!
Today I hate stupid delivery drivers that get lost and eff up breakfast meetings at work.
Hahaha I love all of these! Obvs #7 especially but thankfully there's a lot of 4 and 5 am bars to help me out.
And I totally know more racist jokes than anyone, ever, but I tell people it's ok because my dad is Indian so I can't really be racist! I'm just funny.
And I've never had a tick and I thank god Hawkeye doesn't go outside cause wtf would I do if she got one?!
I hate the kids who walk in front of my house and throw their shit on my lawn. (Not actual shit, like McDonald's cups.)
I'm following you because you used the f word. And because number 7.
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