My Fam Damily

My family is excellent....like really excellent.  I miss the shit out of them since I moved to Maryland.  My friends still hang out with my parents which makes me jealous and happy all at the same time.  The best part of my family, and why my friends always come back for more is that there is never a dull moment.  My sister (the quiet one of the bunch) refers to my parent's house as a circus.  And it really is, particularly when I am in town.  My parents and I are LOUD, someone is always drunk, the music is blaring, people are coming and going, friends are showing up unannounced, the phone is ringing, my dad is being sassy, the dog is barking, and I love every minute of it.  Now that my sister has a little tike and a dog of her own running around, shit gets even crazier.  And that is just inside the house, we are no tamer when we embark out into the wild of Metro-Detroit. 

My sister may be quiet, but she is just as strange and crazy as the rest of us.  Her favorite place on earth is called Gibraltar Trade Center.  It is a large indoor flea market that always has some strange trade show going on.  They host the world's trashiest carnival each summer and even have a tattoo parlor and pet shop in the midst of the various Gypsy vendors.  It is my personal hell on earth.  I feel as though I have entered the twilight zone whenever I set foot inside. For some reason though I find myself in this odd place at least once a year with my sister. I really can't even do justice to just how odd this place is, but if you ever find yourself in the Metro-Detroit area don't go! 

Here is a text my sis sent me regarding her most recent Gibraltar trip:

My mom is possibly the wildest of all of us.  It is no surprise to find her dancing on top of a bar or even in a cage.  Hell, she danced in a cage once when there wasn't even music playing.  My mom loves her nickname Big Sandy even though she is anything but big physically.  She holds annual bashes in their neighborhood and always finds the perfect ways to piss off my dad, The Warden.  He is good at pissing her off in return.

Big Sandy knows all about the Beibs and Maroon Five, she keeps up with all the current trends and even suggested the book 50 Shades of Gray to her church book club.  I like to call her Mombo.

You really don't mess with Big Sandy.  She does what the F**k she wants when the F**k she wants.

Even my parent's dog Butch is a wild card.  He is not playful like most dogs, never was.  He loves two things: food and walks.  Mostly food.  My sister is his go to dog sitter when my rents travel.