GBC

In case you aren't in the know, that stands for Green Bean Casserole. Also known as, my favorite Thanksgiving dish. My mom has been making this shit for years and I will eat the left overs for days.

No lie, back when I lived in the same state as my family my sister and I would bring Tupperware dishes of GBC in the car during our Black Friday adventures. We would eat it to refuel between stores....ahh the memories.

So as much as I love the taste of good old fashion processed as all getup traditional GBC, I do not eat processed foods these days so that leaves me in a bit of a pickle. (note: I do in fact eat gas station food when I'm real wasted, but I am only human after all)

Last year I took action on this problem and created my own version of GBC. It is still packed full of fat and salt, but it is  still far healthier than anything that comes from a can in my opinon, whatever that is worth...keep in mind I have also spent 14 hours of my life watching Hallmark holiday movies in the past three weeks so my sanity is certainly questionable.

I figured, this is a perfect recipe to share with all my little homies before everyone's favorite bird comes out to play on Thursday.

GBC

You Will Need:

Fresh green beans (a lot of them)
Garlic
Half and half (I use fat free even though it is probably not "Clean")
Onions
Flour
Butter
Mushrooms
Worshteshire sauce
Salt
Pepper
Garlic

Directions:

-Rinse and trim the ends off your green beans. Boil them for a few minutes and them blanch them in cold water to stop them from cooking. You want the beans tender but not mushy, they will cook a bit longer in the oven so don't worry about them being a little crisp. Drain all the water off your beans and dump them into a baking dish....I say the cuter your dish the better the beans will taste.

-Now it is time to get your cream of mushroom sauce working. Melt a small pat of butter in a sauce pan and add in chopped mushrooms and saute until they are soft. Now add in a little tiny bit more butter and a bit of flour...I add my flour in a little bit at a time until it forms a paste with the butter. The actual measurements all depend on how much GBC you are making.

-Now that you have a paste start slowly whisking in your cream. You will probably use about a cup or so once again depending on how much GBC. You want the sauce to be soupy but still a bit thick. I add in garlic, a little salt, pepper, and worchteshier here for flavor.

-Let the sauce cook a few minutes then remove from heat to thicken.

-Pour the sauce over your beans and set them aside.

-Now comes the most important step. The fried onions. We all know those little devils you buy in the store are friggen amazing and I could eat about ten containers of them, but they are full of all kinds of weird shit I just can't put into my body when I'm sober so I am faced with a big predicament here. I have yet to make anything that comes close to being as awesome as those onions so I often skip making them and buy the organic version at Whole Foods to cover my GBC with. You can however make them which I have done a few times. To make them you just slice up some onion into thin strips, dip it into flour, then dip it into milk (buttermilk or cream or whatever...egg might work too), then dip back in the flour again. Then just bake them in the oven for twenty min or so. But like I said, you can get them at Whole Foods too, so the choice is yours.

-Now you want to bake your GBC. Place the casserole into the pre-heated oven (350) covered with foil. Bake for twenty minutes or so, then add your onions. Continue baking 10-15 minutes uncovered or until the onions are golden brown.

You will never look at GBC the same way again, this version tastes about 20 times better than the canned variety, so in other words one of the best things you can put in your mouth.

Drunkin' Chicken

No, that is not Jose's pet name for me, it is what I made for dinner last night.

And by last night I mean Sunday night because that is when I put that shit together.

So, to lay the ground work....every single Monday and Wednesday for the past 5ish months, I have gone straight to the gym after work, taken two classes, then come home at 8pm. There have been a total of maybe three times when this schedule has altered.

Without fail though, every Monday and Wednesday night Jose says he will have dinner ready, yet when I walk in the door he always says he wasn't sure when I would be home so he hadn't started cooking. I guess his cell service must get shut off on those days or something, I dunno. He also on multiple occasions has complained that 8:30 is too late for him to eat dinner during the week.

I don't know about you all, but if I get hungry I eat, I do not need to wait for him to come home. I know he likes to eat dinner together and all but come on. So in an effort to prevent our imminent divorce over this issue (can non married folks get divorced, I like to think we can) I decided to start using the good old crock pot.

I am always hesitant to use the crock pot because my mom used to make literally everything we ate in the slow cooker and after awhile it all starts to taste the same if you ask me, but I also don't want Jose to starve to death so we are going to give it a go for a while here.

Last night we enjoyed what I like to call Dunkin' Chicken and it was really friggen good.

 

Drunkin' Chicken

You Will Need:

Chicken (shocker)
1 Large onion
Carrots
Red Skin taters
Garlic
Salt
Pepper
I bottle of beer


Directions:

-Slice up your onion (I go for pretty good size chunks not diced or anything like that), carrot, potato, and garlic. Put that shit in the crock pot.

-Next add in a few pieces of chicken. We had bone in chicken in the freezer so that's what I used but anything will do. I didn't even defrost it first just stuck it in the pot on Sunday night and cooked it all day Monday.

-Cover the meat and veggies with a bottle of beer, a little salt and pepper and you are all set! Just turn the bad boy on low and cook all day while you are at work. You are left with a really simple hearty warm dinner. And your boyfriend won't starve. Win. Win.

is this what adults do?

Just when I think nothing can surprise me, I go and do something so outlandish I am left utterly amazed.

Just this weekend, I did what many adults around the globe do on a regular basis, and frankly I am proud as punch.

You see kids, Friday night the boyfriend and I went out to a bar as we do many a Friday night.

We had one drink and split an appetizer at said bar.

Next we walked to another bar and had one more drink.

After cashing out we made our way to a third bar for one more drink and two appetizers.

Then we went home. We did not do any shots of Fireball whiskey, I did not mooch cigarettes off any strangers, we did not invite 28 people back to our 600 square foot apartment, we didn't even give in to the drunk munchies and consume the entire contents of our refrigerator when we got home.

It was a great night.

I woke up Saturday morning sans hangover thinking, "wow, maybe I am finally not an alcoholic."

And I was happy.

But then Saturday night rolled around.

It was back to business as usual when we had a few friends over and somehow the 6 of us managed to go through a case and a half of beer and a good portion of the liquor in the house...woof.

I could say I am mad at myself for being such a wild one, but I think I am just taking baby steps into becoming a grown up. I will get there one of these days.

How was your weekend?

Give me all your money

So I work for a non-profit. It is pretty not awesome in the sense that I make really shitty money and it is usually a thankless job, but on the flip side I would never want to work in any other sector.

I feel pretty damn good about what I do almost every day. I work for a park and museum that is free and open to the public. We do a lot to offer a great learning experience to everyone in the community and visiting the region. As much as I am not a kid person per se, I love the fact that I in some way am helping kids gain happy memories and showing them the awesomeness that is being outdoors!

Right now I am working on a crowd funding campaign to raise money to completely redesign our children's discovery room. We are calling it the Disco Room and it is going to be awesome!!

If you would like to know a little more about the project you can visit our fundraiser page here.

Since it is the season of giving, I am asking for all your help...I promise not to ask for anymore favors for at least another week.

It would be incredible if you could spread the word about this campaign, or if you could donate a small amount...but honestly if you would be willing to tweet this shit, or Facebook it or anything else, I will love you forever!

And if you want, and you share this, I will let you take over my blog for a day!! I know I am no big shot blogger, but hey....you can swear on this space and that is always fun.

Donate online to Discovery Room Redo at Razoo

We even made a video...now that is fancy!

Squashfredo

It's pretty much the same thing as Sharknado, but instead I combined fettuccine alfredo with spaghetti squash.

To say it was a delight is a bit of an understatement. The manfriend and I each ate our body weight in this stuff and I don't feel bad about it...well maybe a little, but only a little.

The reason I chose to put my twist on the old classic fettuccine alfredo was that we had some really good parmesan cheese in the fridge and a spaghetti squash laying around, what else was a girl to do.

You should make it too.

Squashfredo


You will need:

Spaghetti Squash
Low Fat Milk (I use coconut milk, the kind in the carton not can, but any milk will do)
A dab of butter
Some good parmesan cheese (not the crap in the green plastic jar, some nice shredded stuff)
A pinch of flour
Garlic
Paprika
Salt and pepper

Directions:

-Cook your squash however you like to do it. Some people use the old microwave, I prefer to slice the bad boy in half and bake it in a dish in the oven with a bit of water for 30 minutes or so at 350.

-Scrape out the seeds of your squash and throw them away. Use a fork to scrape out the meat of the squash and put it in a bowl.

-Set the squash aside to cool a bit and make your sauce.

-In a sauce pan combine a little bit of butter and flour over medium heat...I used about a 1 tablespoon but it depends how much you are making. Stir the butter and flour until it forms a paste, or rue if you will.

-Next slowly whisk in your milk. Once the milk is stirred in lower the heat to just about a simmer and start slowly adding in your cheese, garlic, and seasonings to taste. The salt I used was sea salt flavored with chili peppers but you know I like everything I eat spicy so any old salt will do, or any old spices for that matter.

-Keep whisking as you mix in the cheese, now the more cheese the merrier always, but I honestly didn't use much in an effort to keep the dish somewhat healthy. I probably used around 1/4 cup and that made enough sauce for 3 giant ass servings, but really use as much as you want and it will be good.

-Continue stirring on low heat for a few minutes or so then remove sauce from heat to thicken. Serve over the squash and enjoy that shit.

 

A bunch of damn grinches

Now I make it no secret that I am pretty much Miss Kringle when it comes to all things holiday cheer.

I have watched ten (yes ten) hours of cheesy Lifetime/Hallmark holiday movies in the last two weeks, I can't stop shopping, and I am already mulling over what to wear to various holiday affairs.  I recognize that not everyone loves the season like I do, but yesterday my Christmas spirit got thoroughly pissed off.

You see, for our work holiday party, a different department plans the party each year. In the 2.5 years since I have been here it has not been my departments turn. This year is the maintenance department and since the department is comprised entirely of men I struck while the iron was hot and told the department head I would be his bitch in regards to the party planning.

One of his ideas for the party (which I find super sweet) is to hang signs around the room that have everyone's description of what the holidays means to them printed on them. So at the chili cook off the other day he asked that everyone write just that on an index card. He collected them and yesterday asked me to design the signs.

As I typed out everyone's holiday sentiments, most were sweet and said things like, "eat, drink, and be merry" or "time with friends and family".

You had your occasional weirdo one like, "hot cocoa and burning things". Clearly I work with an arson but whatever.

And then there were the down right nasty ones and it really made me sad. Number one, the department head who asked for people to write on the cards is about the nicest man you could ever meet in your life so even if you hate Christmas you think you could find it in yourself to lie for his sake, but no.

I read through card after card that read Grinchy ass shit like this:

"Obligatory time with strange family members"

"NO SLEEP. NO REST"

"Empty wallet"

"I can do without Christmas"

"Not a fan"

"Bah Humbug"

"Stress"

What the frick is wrong with people? I just don't get it. How can you hate something so wonderful? And I am not talking about Christmas per se, because I know there is Hanuka and Kwanzaa and shit to consider, but I mean the holiday season as a whole.

You know what the holidays means to me? Well I will tell you, and you should tell me too, because i need my spirit restored...

-Spending time laughing with friends and family.

-Drinking my mom's homemade Irish Liquor.

-Eating delicious homemade food and cookies.

-Baking cookies for everyone you know.

-Buying presents for kids you don't know...what other time of year does this happen, riddle me that!

-Finding the perfect gift for someone you love and lighting up when they open it.

-Dressing your dog up for holiday pictures.

-People extending kindness...Jose and I were invited to Thanksgiving dinner by my co-worker because we are not able to make the trip to Michigan. It is so kind and generous of their family to take us in, and just the other day another co-worker asked if we had anywhere to go and offered a place if we didn't. That melts my friggen heart.

-Driving around looking at Christmas lights.

-Sitting around a table and sharing a meal with people you care about.

-Being just a little bit nicer to everyone you pass.

-Putting your change in a fake Santa's pot because you know it goes to a good cause.

All these things. I know the holidays are expensive and there is a lot of work involved, but they are really only as stressful as we make them, and I think if more people would just relax and enjoy instead of going bonkers with spending money and rushing around they could start to love the season too.

the loosing chili...

Last week my work hosted a chili cook off.

We have every year, and for the past two years I have won "Best Chili Name".

And that my friends is an F-ing joke. I have no interest in winning best name, I want the coveted honor of "Crowd Favorite".

This year, I just knew would be my year. I searched recipe after recipe and thought long and hard about who would be eating this chili and what they would all like most.

I contemplated going with a veggie chili and then decided, no. This is a meat loving crew...my hippie food will not win the prize.

I considered making a ground turkey chili, but if there is one thing I have learned from Chopped...it is that low fat food does not win cooking contests. I even thought about tweaking my chicken chili recipe from last year and giving it another shot, but alas I decided on an Italian style chili. I thought it was a shoe in.

I regret to inform you my chili didn't win shit. Not even best name, which went to "Pull My Finger Chili" lame. I called mine "The Guido" which I thought was just adorable...I guess my co-workers aren't Jersey Shore fans.

Anyway, even though it lost, the chili tasted really good and I am going to share the recipe. Manfriend and I ate the pot of loser chili for like 5 days and never got sick of it so it can't be that bad.

The Guido Italian Chili

You Will Need:

Ground Italian Sausage
Can of Crushed Tomatoes
Can of Tomato Sauce
Can of Cannelloni Beans
Green Pepper
Onion
Garlic
Zucchini
Paprika
Salt
Pepper
Red Pepper Flakes
Paprika
Italian Seasoning
Chili Powder

Directions:

-Brown your Italian sausage in a large pot until well browned. Drain the grease and add in chopped onion and peppers.

-When the peppers and onions are well cooked add in garlic and continue to saute another minute or two.

-Now add in your chopped zucchini, cans of tomatoes and sauce, beans, and all your seasonings to taste. I also added in a few cans of water.

-Simmer over medium heat for an hour or so. Serve and enjoy!